


Trough the looking glass.

by Elit3



Category: The Musketeers (2014)
Genre: Aftermath of Torture, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Depression, Hospitals, Hurt Aramis | René d'Herblay, M/M, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Protective Athos | Comte de la Fère, Psychological Torture, Torture
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-10
Updated: 2021-01-10
Packaged: 2021-03-13 18:53:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,307
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28658274
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Elit3/pseuds/Elit3
Summary: Aramis and Athos were kidnapped. The trick is that Athos is forced to watch Aramis being tortured. Will the Musketeers be able to save them?
Relationships: Aramis | René d'Herblay/Athos | Comte de la Fère
Comments: 8
Kudos: 18





	Trough the looking glass.

**Author's Note:**

> This fic is darker than the first one I had already written but I hope that you will like it anyway.

It was a dull pain that awakened Athos from his dreamless sleep. He did not remember at first what happened to him or where he was. All he could feel was the devastating migraine he had and was acutely attached to a steel chair.

Once the scrambler that obscured his mind began to dissipate, Athos could finally remember the events that brought him to this situation.

He remembers being in bed with a body lying on top of him. Aramis, whispered to him his sleeping brain, it was Aramis who was with him in bed. He was almost asleep when he heard his youngest colleague whisper: "I love you ... even though I know it's not reciprocal." The older man felt all the fatigue leaving his body when he asked Aramis what he meant by that.

After that, Athos did not really remember. But he was sure that what had been a whisper of a half-sleeping man had turned into a full-fledged real dispute. In the end, Aramis said, "I love you. I've been loving you for a long time now. And I thought that being your dirty little secret would be enough, that I could handle it. But I can't. I'm not enough, not enough for you to crack that wall you created after your divorce. I understand that and I respect it, but you will never be able to love me as I deserve. So I stop, I give up, it's over: you and I, it's ... »

But Aramis never finished his sentence, could never break what he and Athos had, for he fell to the ground like a marionette who would have lost his strings. Fortunately, Athos caught up with his lover before his head hit the ground and it was at this point that he noticed the dart that was embedded in the young man's neck. At this sight, the adrenaline took possession of his body and repelled the darkness that threatened to overwhelm him when he felt a sting in his neck. So instead of collapsing, he tried to protect his lover. But it was too late, he had been too disoriented to hear the footsteps coming from behind him and before he could do anything, something hard connected with the back of his head. The world of Athos then plunged into darkness.

"Aramis." His partner's name left his mouth unconsciously, he was too worried for the young man to care. He was with him and any kidnapper with a little judgment would have taken both. Except that Aramis was not with him. Athos tried to get rid of his bonds, but a laugh from behind him forced him to stop.

"How cute. One of the most intelligent and trained soldiers on the planet is currently chain to a vulgar iron chair, and yet he cares more about his bitch than his own safety. It's romanticly touching, or pathetic, I haven't decided yet." The man's voice was distorted to prevent Athos from recognizing the voice.

"Where is he? Athos asked. Who are you and what do you want? »  
"Fast and efficient, I like it. So to answer your very specific questions, I will say: before you, no one, and all the information you hold about the company of Musketeers, the Red Guards and about The Crown of France. »

"And I suppose you're torturing me if I don't tell you what you want to hear?"

"To be honest, that was the basic plan. But then, well, let's say Santa gave me my gift before the hour. »

The man stepped into Athos' line of sight, the man was nothing special in his traditional three-piece suit, except that he was wearing a mask. Since he showed Athos his back, he could see the blond hair and pale skin of his jailer. The man faced a normal mirror that reflected the masked man and the musketeer attached to the chair.

"The original plan wasn't really thought through, I admit. After all, we both know you'd be dead before to have revealed anything to me. Except that the plan changed once my men brought me, two musketeers, for the price of one. »

Athos could imagine the smile of his jailer expanding into a smile worthy of a predator who would have caught his prey. The man pressed a button on his remote control and the vision in the mirror changed. It was no longer the reflection of the two men in the mirror but that of a half-naked Aramis, all that was left was his boxer - which actually belonged to Athos. He was tied in the middle of the room with his arms above his head.

The rooms of the two inmates looked similar, two sterile and white rooms with a small bed in a corner, a faucet, and a toilet. But the great difference between the two, to what Athos could see at the moment, was that he could see Aramis but that it was not reciprocal since the young man's look did not change when their jailer changed the reflection of the mirror. So he tried to scream, but neither did his lover heard him.

"Oh, he can't hear you, said the man. But thanks to this one-way mirror and the speakers you will have the privilege of seeing and hearing everything that will happen in the other room. As I said, Mr. de Sillègue, the plan has changed. So my men will torture your whore over and over and over again until you tell me what I want to know, or your lover dies. It will depend on what will happen first."

"If you touch him, I swear you'll regret it!" Athos' eyes were like razor blades ready to slit the blond man's throat.

"I can swear to you that I will not touch him, but I cannot make that same promise for my men."

"Why? Why are you doing this? What do you think you will receive by torturing him and not me? »

"See Athos, can I call you Athos? I'm going to call you Athos." The man began to leave the room. "where would be the fun in that? ».

A sordid sound of metal then echoed into the room, signaling that the jailer had just finished his speech.

Ahtos looked helpless as a man entered Aramis' room with a toolbox in his hand. 

« Where is Athos ?! » yelled Aramis.

The man simply pulled a knife out of his toolbox.

As for Athos, he prayed that Porthos and D'Artagnan would hurry to find them. Something in the words of the masked man gave cold sweats to Athos.

He would have so much to be tortured instead of Aramis, it would have been much easier to deal with. Instead, he had to look helpless while masked men going after Aramis. They started by making gashes in his skin, then they beat him and finally they whipped him.

At first, Aramis dropped sarcastic remarks on sarcastic remarks, being his usual self who would not be intimidated by "masked monkeys". Then there were nothing but grunts, and at last, Aramis did not even take the trouble to raise his head or make a noise.

It was five days ago, yet Athos felt it as an eternity. The gorillas had pulled them out of their constraints and the two prisoners could now move as they pleased in their respective rooms. Every day, what looked like the band leader came into Athos's room and asked him the same question again and again: "Are you ready to collaborate?" to which the musketeers always answered differently, but each answer is summed up in "no." With each negative answer, the chief ordered his minions to have fun with the youngest musketeer. Except that the masked monkeys were not only physically attacking, no, their torture techniques also went even further. They had fun insulting him with every name possible and imaginable, they wake him up with buckets of water glazed ... But Aramis was much stronger than that because every night the musketeer was looking for a way to escape. If only he knew that Athos was right next door... Thus, Athos made a promise to himself, he would not say anything and would wait for the arrival of Porthos and D'Artagnan, but if it goes too far and Aramis can no longer bear it then... then he'll tell them everything. The crown can go to hell. 

On the eighth day, the gorillas changed tactics and decided to drown Aramis. They didn't even look for a basin or bucket of water. They blocked the sink until it was full of water, then handcuffed Aramis' hands behind his back and forced him to move in front of the sink where they began torturing their prisoner. They drowned him for a few seconds and then let him rest, they repeated the process over and over again, while keeping him underwater longer and longer. At first, Aramis had tried to struggle, but the more he was drowning, the less he struggled. When the men finally left him alone, the musketeer found himself on the ground, unconscious. In the other room, Athos yelled to leave him alone. He had even tried to hit the glass, but it remained unbreakable.

During the night of what appeared to be the fifteenth day - more or less - Aramis tried to escape. Trying is the keyword here. Athos was stunned as his lover managed to force the door lock. On the one hand, Athos could only be proud of Aramis to try to escape, however, on the other hand, he was terribly worried about what would happen to Aramis if he got caught. He listened at the door to try to hear what was happening on the other side, but he couldn't hear much. Of course, just like the other musketeer, Athos had tried to count the changing of the guard and the movement where no one would be behind the door, but the piece was very well soundproofed. Apparently, Aramis must have had a thinner ear because he doesn't get caught right away. For, five minutes, Athos was happy because Aramis would be free. Except that these hopes were reduced to 0 when two gorillas brought an unconscious Aramis back to his cell.

The consequences of this action were quickly realized, for, after a maximum of 3 hours, a man entered the room with only a mass in his hand. The masked man prepared himself as if he were on a gulf ground holding the sledgehammer with both hands above his head and then as if he were going to hit a rubber bullet, the man dropped his mass on the left leg of Aramis, who awoke screaming because of the pain. Athos shouted at the same time for his brother-in-arms, whose leg had just broken without a shadow of a doubt.

Apparently, they still wanted their prisoner to survive because on Sunday, Aramis received as a "gift" a splint for his leg as well as medication to calm the pain.

After what was three weeks of beings locked in a sterille room - the chief had just told him this news - Athos noticed that there was a day in the week when no one came to bother Aramis in his prison. On reflection, the musketeer assumed that this day should be Sunday, which would make sense. On that day, the food was a little more generous than the traditional pieces of bread with cheese. The head of this operation visited Athos on a daily basis, who continued to answer the same thing.  
"I must admit that I am impressed, began the chef, it's almost a month and yet you continue to be so stubborn. Athos did not answer. But what's the point of doing all this? Out of loyalty? Louis doesn't care if you live or die, so why should you pass on the welfare of your whore to someone who doesn't care about you. »

"This is the code of musketeers, of my brothers-in-arms."

"Your brothers... the man laughed. Shouldn't Porthos and d'Artagnan have already come to your rescue? Where are they? »

"They're coming, I have faith in them"

This remark made the man laugh even louder.

"Your faith is useless. If they haven't found you yet then they never will and in the meantime, my men can continue to have fun with your roommate. »

"Aramis is stronger than you think."

Athos says these words with his head held high. Aramis was definitely stronger and more resilient than these masked men seemed to think.

"Who are you trying to convince?"

The man left without saying another word.

During these three weeks, the means of torture had greatly changed. The piece had been conceived in such a way that it was in itself a room of torture. Indeed, the men were not obliged to enter the room to torture the musketeer. For example, while Aramis was asleep the brightness increased at once as lightning before the thunder. They also used the loudspeakers to transmit a sound that could awake a dead man. Where they could also lower the temperature of the room. Athos could see the light, but he did not really know what sound was coming out of the loudspeakers or the temperature of the room next door, all he could see was the reactions of his brother-in-arms.

On the twenty-second day, after a sleepless night and after they broke his fingers with his right hand, Aramis screamed, obviously, he had already shouted before but there it was different. This time, he begged them to tell him why they were doing all this? Why him? That night, Aramis placed his hand on the mirror without knowing it. On the other side, Athos placed his hand in the same place as Aramis, naively hoping that this action might comfort the wounded man.

Another day, they used a device to remove the skin from Aramis's left arm.

The leader of the mercenaries had decided to proceed differently to get his answers. Thus, he put an electric collar on the neck of the already injured musketeer. Whenever Athos looks away, the necklace will activate. Whenever he does not answer a question, the collar will activate. This torture deeply affected the older man, because this time he had a direct role in the pain his lover felt.

It was only after the thirtieth day that Athos realized how stupid he had been. After his divorce from his ex-wife, he had become blocked himself from the world, had built thick walls to prevent others from entering. At first, with Aramis it was only a one-night stand, something quick without feelings, a mistake made by two drunk men. They didn't even talk about it the next day and things went on as usual. Except that the error was repeated, twice, three times, and the weeks passed and turned into more, and then without him noticing, more than a year had passed. The error of one evening had become more, it was no longer secret meetings in the place of Aramis or Athos. Instead, they went into what any sensible person would have called a date but for Athos it was just outings with a colleague. Why was he so stupid? And now, oh how he was regretting not having responded positively when Aramis had said he loved him. Of course, it would not have changed anything about their abduction but at least the other musketeer would have known the truth. That Athos loved him too. Instead, Aramis thought that he was all alone.

Athos was not a believer, or at least not as much as his lover, but that did not prevent him from praying for Porthos and d'Artagnan to hurry.

One night, Aramis awoke from one of his many nightmares with Athos's first name on his lips. The captain of the musketeers would love to be able to tear their walls apart to take the other man in his arms and tell him that everything will be fine.

On the fortieth day, men returned to the room to tie Aramis to his bed. This task was easy for them since the musketeer was not really in a position to make great opposition. They hooked him to two intravenous - one in each arm - before leaving. Neither Athos nor Aramis understood the usefulness of the two intravenous or why the musketeer had been tied to his bed. But then the youngest arched himself into his bed and tried to get rid of his shackles. This strange event ended quickly and Aramis fell back into his bed. Athos still did not understand what had happened except for the obvious part where his lover had been in great pain. As always, it was the Chief who explained to him what had happened. The first intravenous was harmless, just sweet water so that Aramis would not die. While the second contained a kind of poison that caused intense pain. Of course, it was the man in his three-piece suit who had the remote control that controlled the intravenous and the flow of poison into Aramis' blood. Seconds could happen between aftershocks or minutes or even one or two hours. The young man's screams of pain had finally given way to silent weeping, and then to whispers in the name of Athos, Porthos, D'Artagnan, and Treville, and finally, Aramis did not even make a noise, as if he were out of his body.

The treatment lasted about a week. A week during which, Athos had tried to use the iron chair to destroy the mirror. This one had only a little fissure, while the chair was half destroyed. When a man had entered Aramis's room to untie his ties, Aramis did not even move, as if he had not noticed that the ties had been removed. The man also removed the intravenous full of poison but left the other.

For another week, no one entered Aramis's room except to change his intravenous. However, in Athos's room, the masked jailor continued to come every day.

"What are the secrets of the Red Guards, the Musketeers, and Louis?" he asked every day.

"The code of the musketeers..." Athos repeated.

"How can you enter the castle without being noticed?"

"Where would Treville and Louis have hidden the crown jewels?"

"What are the exact rounds of the Musketeers and the Red Guards?"

"You have right to not be talking. After all, I don't think to have any more use from either of you. Look at him, he doesn't even move out of bed. Maybe it's already too late. Your lover is as good as dead. »

After what looks like two months of being locked in this stupid room, something changed. A new man entered Aramis's room. Athos could have recognized this man from anywhere. Pale skin. Blond hair. A red and black suit. Mr. Rochefort. Which didn't make sense since Rochefort would never have come to save them, not alone at least. No, it smelled like a trap. Especially since Rochefort's back and the one the jailer looked alike. The same hair, the same skin, only the suit changed. But why would Rochefort have questioned him about the Red Guard when the latter is in charge? 

On the other side of the room, Rochefort went to Aramis' bedside, had removed the intravenous, and was currently trying to wake the sleeping man. Aramis seemed barely conscious, but Athos heard him being surprised at Rochefort's presence in the room.

"R-Rochefort...? How...? »

"Later! They're coming, we have to leave. Rochefort helped Aramis out of bed under Athos's stunned gaze, however, the two men did not go far as Aramis fell instantly. "Damn!" Rochefort passed one of the musketeer's arms over his shoulder and lifted the injured man who screamed because of the sudden movement. "Come on, I'm going to carry you. »

Athos didn't really understand what happened next as it happened in a split second but apparently, Aramis had just pushed Rocheford away, causing him to fall. The musketeer was half-sitting on the bed and half on the floor.

"What's happening to you? We don't have time to play his antics! We have to go now! »

"Stop your game, Rochefort," Aramis whispered, his throat must be hurting him just by talking.

"What game?" Rochefort tried to take Aramis's arm back, but the man pushed him away again. "The mercenaries are coming! So, we have to go! »

"They won't come. You sent them away." The blond-man was about to speak, but Aramis cut him off. "You are not my savior, Rocheford. You're my jailer. »

The jailer had the benefit of appearing half-shocked.

"I came here to save you, under Anne's command. She was worried about you. »

"Oh yes, so how did you manage to get here? You have come here alone, uninjured, and you have even managed to open the door." Aramis's voice was getting weaker and sweat was pouring down his forehead.

"I passed during the break of the mercenaries, so come before they finish their four-hour. And if you want to know so much, I hacked the door. »

"Impossible, Aramis smiles weakly, the keepers are always doing three rounds at ten minutes apart, then two every twenty minutes and another after two minutes. The pattern is quite repetitive. But the guards were three minutes late today, and you arrived in the middle of the fourth round. Aramis coughed. Don't look so surprised, Rochefort, for the past two weeks I had all my time to count the relievers of your guards. He shrugged his shoulders, though the movement maked him do a grimace. And for your last statement, the door has no code but a key. I noticed it on my last excursion outside this lovely door. »

Athos smiles at the brave look of his lover. For the past two weeks, he had been so afraid for Aramis, seeing him so catatonic had frightened him. But it seemed that the musketeer next door tried to fool the mercenaries. And he could only be impressed sending that Aramis too had retained the watch of the mercenaries. The only thing Athos didn't know was that the door had a lock. In the other room, however, Rochefort looked mad with rage, but he tried to hide it by clapping his hands and smiling.

"I guess I can stop pretending now."

"So you did this to me."

"Me? But I didn't even touch you. »

"That's true. But that makes you an even worse person. You are the puppeteer who hides in the shadows like a coward. »

Rochefort stepped forward and grabbed his prisoner's cheeks in a firm grip.

"And I who had come here to congrats you... I'm hurt. But more seriously, I didn't think you'd last that long, two months! It's still impressive. »

"So what? Are you going to give me a pin? »

"Two months and my men still haven't taught you good manners. Don't worry I will fix it. Nevertheless, I must admit that I am even more disappointed by the behavior of your brothers-in-arms. Aramis stared at Rochefort with a murderous air. All these "one for all, and all for one!" are nothing more than poetic words in the end."

"You don't know what the word loyalty means," Aramis spat in response.

"You're probably right. But if that's your "loyalty" then I'm glad to do without it. I mean, a lot of things happened in two months. The musketeers raised land and sea to find you, they organized multiple searches, put your face on all the news channels. They even asked me, to the Red Guard, for help to tell you how desperate they were. As you guessed, I sent them to false leads. But hey, it's all in the past. After all, I almost shed a tear at your funeral so touching. »

« ... what? »

"What a pity you missed it, really, it was great."

"You're lying!"

"I have no reason to lie. Treville's speech was full of praise, and even Athos, Porthos, and D'Artagnan said a little something in your honor."

"Athos was at the funeral?"

"Obviously, where else would you like him to be? Ah, dear Athos, the first month was pretty rough for him but during the second, well, let's say he found someone else to warm up his bed. Come on don't make that head, after all, it was his idea to bury an empty coffin. »

The man in question really wanted to kill Rochefort right now. Well, even more than before.

"I don't believe you. You think you know them but you're wrong, they would never have given up so easily. They will come.»

"Even Athos?"

"Especially him. Not because we slept together, but because he is my brother-in-arms first and foremost. So, if you have nothing else to say, I will ask you to get out of my cell. »

Rochefort was about to go out but stopped.

"Actually, I had a proposal for you." Aramis faintly raised an eyebrow at this, Rochefort drew closer to the wounded man. "It's twice nothing, promised," the jailer touched his prisoner's left knee. "One night. Just one night. Just you and me where we'd do the same thing you did with Athos, what do you think? »

"You're sick, Aramis spat on Rochefort's cheek, I'll never sleep with you."

"Why not? What's the difference between Athos and me? Besides, it would only be one night, no one would have to know what happened. This is your chance to be free. I will offer you a passport with a whole new identity. Aramis doesn't say a word. Let me guess, you think you will go back to the musketeers and accuse me, right? Rocheford laughed. Have you ever looked at yourself lately? You can't even get up on your own. Look the truth in the face, you are only a shadow of yourself! »

"Rochefort...?"

"Yes?"

"Go burn in hell!"

After uttering these words, Aramis thrust a needle into Rochefort's eye. The latter staggered until he came into contact with the door, which he opened with his only free hand. Their jailer left while saying threats.

Aramis's strength seemed to leave him immediately after this altercation as the young man fell to the ground, without energy, with his head resting on his lap. However, his grip on the needle remained the same. 

Never before had Athos felt this need to be in the other room so badly. He had to be with Aramis. This subterfuge had lasted long enough. 

As if by magic or as if the gods had listened to Athos' prayers, the steel door fell to the ground with a great boom. Smoke billowed from the new entrance. The musketeer was petrified while a man passed through the smoke. Athos raised his arms and shook his hands in closed fists, ready to knock on anyone who passed the door. However, he never struck the newcomer because in front of him was Porthos. The latter laughed before quickly taking Athos in his arms and bringing him into the hallway. D'Artagnan and Tréville, accompanied by a dozen musketeers were waiting for them in the hallway.

"Finally we find you!" exclaimed D'Artagnan. 

"You'll kiss later, we have to go!" 

"No!" all eyes were on Athos, "we can't leave without Aramis." 

"Aramis is here? We thought that he would be lock somewhere else." 

Athos pointed to the door communicating to his. Porthos was about to lay explosive charges on the door, but Athos prevented him from doing so. To the shaken gaze of his friend, the musketeer answered nothing. Instead, he inspected the corridor: there were four doors; his, that of Aramis, a door that was open and from which a mercenary from Rochefort still lay, and a fourth door closed and with a pictogram of a staircase coming down. Drops of blood led to the fourth door where the handle was covered in blood. 

"How many way-out are there in this building?" 

"It's a bunker, so only one," Replied Treville hurriedly, the old man followed the blood and seemed to understand where Athos was leading the conversation to. "The entrance is cordoned off by musketeers and FBI agents. They're like rats stuck in a fire building." 

"All right, D'Artagnan, Treville and you others go down and do what you have to do. Porthos will stay with me to watch the corridor, "Athos caught Treville's arm before the old man could leaves, "there will be a rat with a bleeding-eye down there, he's mine." 

Treville and d'Artagnan nodded gravely before leaving with the other musketeers. 

In the hallway, only he, Porthos, and another Musketeer who remained to guard the door. His brother-in-arms handed him a key to open Aramis's door, and although Athos wanted to know why they exploded down his door if they had a key, he did not ask and merely opened the door. Before entering, he beckoned Porthos to stay outside.

As he expected, the room was definitely colder than his own and even the lighting was weird. Except he stopped his inspection to focus on what's really important: Aramis. The younger man had collapsed on the floor next to his bed and seemed unable to realize his surroundings, except that he was still holding the needle in his hand. Athos crouched down in front of his lover's wounded form, he tried to touch the other man, but the latter, and by what resembled a defensive reflex, tried to attack the older musketeer with the needle. Athos dodged it easily and sent the needle several meters from their position. He placed his hands on Aramis' cheeks to make him look at him, but the other man jumped because of the movement and tried to recoil from the slight touch. 

"Easy, it's me, Athos." 

Aramis raised his head weakly after hearing the voice, he looked into his captain's eyes and burst into tears. 

"A-Athos..." 

The musketeers took his brother-in-arms and kept a possessive and protective embrace around his lover's trembling and fragile body. 

"You've come, " whispered Aramis faintly. 

"Obviously, I wouldn't have left you behind." 

"But... I-I thought..." 

"Hush. It's okay, I know. Rochefort lied." Aramis mumbled something incomprehensible. In the hallway, a big boom was heard. "Come on, we need to get you out of here. I'm going to carry you." 

Aramis' eyebrows frowned as if he felt something weird was going on here, how did Athos know about his leg? But when he felt his body floated and nausea mounted up his throat, he ignored his questions in favor of closing his eyes and concentrating on not vomiting. 

Athos came out of the room carrying his precious burdens, Porthos made a noise when he saw them, but the captain gave him a stern look and beckoned him to show him the way. On the ground, a body lay, inert. 

"Wait!" cried Aramis.

The latter began to move until Athos had no choice but to let him go. 

"Aramis, calm down! We have to get you out of here now! You're not in a position to move." 

Aramis did not listen to him and seemed to go back the other way, towards the descending staircase. The injured musketeer tried to make a move but his foot couldn't handle to walk and he would have fallen without Athos and Porthos to catch him up. The two men looked into their friend's feverish gaze. The wounded man grabbed Athos by his shirt with a weak grip. 

"R-Rochefort... it's because of him... here... find him..." 

Despite the almost incomprehensible mumble, Athos understood the essentials: Aramis wanted him to find Rochefort. It was on his to-do list, but for now, he had to get his lover out of here. Lover who had just fallen unconscious. Athos was frightened until Porthos, who had just taken the injured man's pulse, gave him a sign that everything was fine. 

"The idiot has just used his last strength, his pulse is weak but stable for now." Athos nodded and was about to take Aramis back in his arms when Porthos stopped him. "I can carry him if you want." 

Athos gave him a black gaze and had tightened his grip on Aramis. Porthos raised his hands in the air as a sign of peace. And they began to walk again towards the entrance to the bunker. 

What comes next becomes blurry for Athos. 

He remembered being dazzled at the entrance to the bunker because about 20 cars were waiting for them. The FBI, county police, and Musketeers were all parked outside the bunker with their headlights on. The noise was almost overwhelming, but the weight in his arms reminded him what he had to do. Fortunately, Porthos was there to guide him through all this world. 

He remembered depositing Aramis' body on a stretcher, recalcitrant. Then a person stood in front of him, holding a light in front of his eyes and asking him ridiculous questions. Why did she ask him stupid questions when Aramis was in danger? 

He remembered staring at D'Artagnan and Treville holding Rochefort between them. Athos wanted to go and give this man what he deserved but Porthos forced him to sit in the ambulance. In any case, his attention was totally redirected to who really mattered when he heard these four words that tore his heart: "He no longer breathes". 

He remembered fighting in Porthos' arms. His mind shouting at him to go to Aramis. All that mattered now was Aramis. But before he knew, everything turns black. 

Athos awoke two days later, lying in a hospital bed. He noticed with surprise that he had been tied to his bed. The Musketeer understood why when he saw that, apart from D'Artagnan who was sleeping in a strange position in a chair, the room was empty. He struggled against the handcuffs, trying to remove them. He struggled so hard that the movement awoke his friend, who ran out of the room. Athos felt someone talk to him after a few minutes, he was asked to calm down but he couldn't. Aramis was not there. Aramis. Aramis! Was he screaming? Perhaps because the nurse seemed to be scared for a moment before putting herself back together and injecting something into her patient's intravenous. Before he realized it, Athos was falling asleep. He hated it when he was forced to sleep. 

He awoke 10 hours later and was much calmer, but he was angry. So angry. Being tied to his fucking bed made him angry. Fortunately, his doctor was quite understanding and ordered that his patient be released. The only good news he received from the day was that he was nothing serious and that he would be released in two days against the promise to follow the doctor's orders. The two bad news, on the other hand, was that he should see a shrink and, worst of all, was that Aramis had not woken up yet. Although the doctor tried to reassure him that Aramis's recovery was well or at least normal in view of the multiple injuries and broken limbs of the hospitalized man.

As promised, he was able to leave two days later on the promise that he would take his medication and rest. He was forced to fill his share of the promise because of Porthos who was playing the babysitter with him. Thus, he had to eat even if he was not hungry and sleep even if the sleep did not come. How could he come when Athos was consumed by guilt and the unceasing need to be near his lover? 

Every day for the first three weeks went the same way: Athos spent as little time as possible in his apartment to be in the hospital where he spent most of his time at Aramis' bedside. He was grateful to Treville for placing guards in front of the chamber of the fallen musketeer. For the rest of his time, Athos had to go to physical therapy to eliminate the consequences of these two months in captivity. The constants of Aramis remained the same although the young man had to remain in an artificial coma for at least a month and a half.

The thing that changed after these three weeks was that the shrink Treville had hired managed to catch Athos. The old man was a vile person to take him by surprise in a room where Athos would refuse to leave no matter what. The old man sat on the sofa which had been regularly occupied by D'artagnan, Porthos, and Constance. The captain only recognized the other man's profession because of the file he had under his arm. The white-haired man opened his file and seemed to study it. Athos decided to ignore him to look at his friend's face. Aramis looked like a fallen angel right now.

"PTSD is a strange phenomenon, isn't it? be forced to relive the same events over and over again, while wondering what could have been done to remedy the situation." 

Athos did not answer. He didn't need to hear it from a shrink to find out what was wrong with him. He already knew it. 

"You are as loquacious as your friends had warned me." 

He turned to look at the old man. 

"While they were there, playing the snooping behind my back, did they also warn you to what I thought of all this?" 

The man laughed, "They told me you didn't think you needed my services." 

"In this case, there is nothing more to add." 

The two men looked at each other and the old man was the first to look away. Realizing that he had lost this battle, the man went away while abandoning his file on the sofa. Athos ignored him. 

The man returns the next day with a newspaper under his arm. The two men did not talk. Dr. Hawkins returns the next day with Sudoku this time, then the next day again but this time he talked about the rain and the good weather. Athos did not answer. The old man spoke for both of them, confiding in the captain his own personal problems. After ten days, Athos got fed up with the good mood of the shrink. 

"Why do you keep coming? all this leads nowhere. I don't want to talk to you." 

"Sometimes humans don't even know what they want. They confuse what they want to do and what they have to do. In that case, you might not want to talk to me but you have to. In the end, you'll understand that you need be."

"I don't need you." 

"And it is precisely because you think you don't need me that I will stay. Besides, if you want revenge on Rochefort, you'll have to confide to me because it will be your only way to face your jailer." 

"All right, Nanny Mcphee." Athos reinstalled himself in his chair and crossed his arms on his chest. "What do you want to know?" 

"Nothing, for now. I'm sure you'll confide in me soon enough. All I need at the moment are confirmations." 

"What kind?" 

"I already gave you my diagnosis when I first walked into this room. But I need to know how touched you are." 

"You're talking about this disorder as a gunshot wound." 

"The difference is minimal, one is physical while the other is psychological. But your analogy is already helping me move forward." Athos raised an eyebrow at this. "You survived two traumatic months without any major injuries while your brother-in-arms is still in intensive care. So I conclude that you would like to be in his shoes." 

"Just like D'Artagnan and Porthos. We'll all sacrifice ourselves for the others." 

"One for all and all for one, I've heard of it." 

"Don't you write it in your file?" asked Athos skeptical. 

"I wish to devote myself totally to you. In addition, I have a good memory, thank you. Although I take note of this subtle attempt to divert my attention." 

The beeps of the heart monitor were the only noises that could be heard in the room. 

"You know, I've already treated several soldiers or civilians who were suffering from PTSD. Most relived the traumatic events they had experienced in their nightmares or when they were awake. Their minds remained stuck on the same thought "what if...", I'm sure you also do, but we'll talk about it later. Others were detached from everything, but in your case, you got attached to one person, one goal: to protect Aramis. I know that you are not only here to watch over your lover, you are currently making sure that no one touches him. These feelings can be dangerous if left untreated, your protection could turn into a feeling of intense possession that could end up destroying you both. The last symptom is the mood swings but your friends told me that you spread your feelings as a robot would." 

"What's the point of doing this, if you already know everything." 

"Your record and my experience allow me to make a rather profound diagnosis, but I don't know how you felt about the different stages of your life, what you experienced in the bunker or your relationship with Aramis." 

"We were having sex together. Do you have a problem with that?" 

"Oh, no. Rest assured. I am not one of his old persons who think that two people of the same sex who love each other should end up at a stake. Because between you and this young man, there was more than sex, wasn't there?" 

"I love him."

"Does he know?" 

"No. The last thing we did before to be kidnapped was to quarrel about the non-reciprocity of my feelings toward his's. So, no, he doesn't know."

"Well, we'll work on it then." The old man grabbed his fetish hat and placed it on his head to leave. "It was interesting, but we will have to postpone this session until tomorrow." 

"So that's it?" 

"I don't like to be too intrusive in a first session, but we've made a lot of progress. In addition, this extra time will give you time to think about what you will tell me tomorrow." 

"Who says I'd like to talk tomorrow?" 

"I've told you before, Captain. You don't want to talk to me but you will, but I now understand that it's not just about revenge, no you will talk to me to help Aramis. Because you see, the physical wounds that your lover is currently suffering from will eventually leave without leaving virtually any trace. However, this episode was extremely traumatic for him, even more so than for you, because Rocheford played with his mind, making him feel lonely and useless or unwanted. You've been there, you've seen what they've done to him, but Aramis doesn't know it and certainly won't want you to know it at first. When you tell him, and you will have to tell him eventually, Aramis will be in a bad place mentally. Trust me on that. He won't appreciate that you already know what had happened to him because he will be ashamed of his time during the bunker. I can help you prepare for what you need to say before and after, how you will have to react when your lover will plunge into an episode of depression. For do not under any illusions, there will be, and at that moment he will need me to understand how he feels. But more than anything, Aramis will need you Athos. Need you to be there for him, to help him, for him to know that you love him no matter what, and above all that you show no weakness because you will have to be strong for him. If he knows that you trust me will be a plus for his recovery."

The shrink left without allowing Athos time to respond. The latter remained stuck on what the old man had just told him but he knew that the man was right. So he began to think about what he should say tomorrow. 

The days went on in the same way, although in Porthos and D'Artganan's opinion, their brother was getting better and better thanks to the shrink. However, what remained in everyone's mind was that their other brother was still in a coma. The doctor continued to say that it was normal, that Aramis's body was healing, and that as soon as he could breathe on his own then he could wake up. Except the Musketeer's injuries were serious. The latter had developed a high fever and doctors remained suspicious of the poison used by the mercenaries. The poison could have left side effects that have not yet appeared. 

It was only after the second month was largely underway that the previously constant state of Aramis changed. The Musketeer no longer needed the respirator and the doctor swore that his patient would soon be out of a coma. All the other musketeers prayed that this moment will come as soon as possible. For his part, Athos remained at his lover's bedside, as he had promised himself that he would be there when Aramis woke up. But once again, the wounded man let himself be desired. He let himself be so desired that Athos began to doubt the chances of seeing the eyes of his love again one day. 

Aramis eventually wakes up on a Sunday morning. The man was disoriented, thirsty, and frightened, but his awakening was calmer than Athos'. And the older man thanked the shrink inwardly for preparing him for what will happen when Aramis wakes up. Of course, he did not immediately find the right words, but he managed to comfort his lover and this was the most important thing.

During these sessions with the shrink, Athos had hesitated about loving or hating the old man especially when the latter asked him to think about his previous marriage or what had happened in the bunker and what he had felt at the time. But now, four months later, and when Aramis finally let his emotions out, Athos was grateful. Aramis was allowed out of the hospital three weeks after waking up and then moved into Athos's apartment. Things had been strange at first, especially as his lover was acting differently from his usual-self. But who could blame him? The younger man refused to go out of the house alone, so Athos accompanied him to every appointment with the shrink or his rehabilitation. Not that he complained, he too was reluctant to leave Aramis out of his sight. Especially when his lover jumped when the brightness became too high, or when someone spoke too loudly, and each time the young man ran directly towards Athos, towards safety. 

Dr. Hawkins called it the phenomenon of dependence: Aramis needed Athos. And that was not good, so as the weeks and months went by, Athos did his best to give Aramis more and more autonomy. First by letting him choose what to do or what to look at, and then by slipping away for a few minutes to leave Aramis alone with one of their friends. It twisted his heart every time he left his lover, but when he heard him laugh with Porthos, he knew it was the right thing to do. They had reached a point where the musketeer was no longer afraid of being left alone in a room, although the presence of Athos in the room was appreciated instead of forced.

One night Aramis had a terrible nightmare that make him scream during his sleep. Rochefort's words seems to be stuck in his mind and were repeating again and again. Athos was now holding the other man in his arms. 

"I'm so sorry 'Mis. All of this, it was my fault."

"You are not omniscient, you couldn't had prevented Rochefort from kidnapping us", Aramis answered between two sobbs. 

"I know but I could had stop them. Each day, Rochefort came into my room questioning me about the Musketeers and about the crown. I should had talked, the monarchie would have been just fine if I had talk or not." 

"If you had talk we would be dead now." 

"This does not make me feel better. I hated seeing them touching you, being helpless is not my thing." 

"Yeah ? And how do you think that I feel ? I am a bloody Musketeer, yet I couldn't fight them." 

"Don't talk like that. At least, you tried to run away." 

"For two seconds, yes. And look what I got : a broken leg. Even, if I had succeeded, how stupid would I have been when I would had realized that you was in the other room", Aramis laughed. 

"And then you would had come for me." 

"You have too many faith on me, my friend." 

"I have as much faith in you that you have faith in me. You are strong, Aramis, if you had escape I have no doubt that you would had came for me." 

For few seconds, none of them talked. Athos maintained a tight hold on his lover while avoiding harming him.

"You're wrong. I am not strong, I wanted to gave up so many times. To let them broke me. There were just so many pain, I couldn't handle it." Tears came back on Aramis's cheeks. "If they had asked me about the Musketeers… I would had all betrayed you." 

"Hey, no." Athos tried to confort the man in his arm. "You wouldn't had betrayed us, we would had understood that you didn't wanted to. And you are not broken, if it is what you think, I don't see you as broken. No one does." 

"But I am not the same man I used to. I can't even hold a gun anymore." 

"That why physiotherapy is important, remember? "

"I know but how can you still be here anyway ? With me."

"Someone have to be here for you." 

"I could have go to Porthos or D'Artagnan and Constance. So why you? After all, you said it yourself : you and I, it is just sex, nothing more." 

"Don't listen to my old me, he was an idiot. I am an idiot not to have realized the chance that I had to be with you."

"Is that your way to declare your flame to me ?"

"Did it work ?" 

"Maybe." Athos smiled and kissed Aramis on his forehead, the youngest took the opportunity to relax on the chest of the older man. "I have to thank you, you know? To never have lost hope in me. I maybe wasn't able to see you but I could feel you. Don't laugh! Even though it kinda sounds stupid. What I meant is: I was sure that you would come and save me. I kept faith in you. But to be 100% honest here, I might have lost hope even before what Rochefort had told me. I think it started while the poison was running through my veins. It was hurting so much, Athos, so much. I couldn't think, couldn't get enough air in my lungs, and all of my muscles were contracting at each drop. But the worst was that there was no pattern, it was pure random so that I couldn't prepare myself for the suffering. After a while, I barely could remember my name but what I could remember was that someone had to come and saved me, but no one did. And when I was stuck in this bed and that the pain stopped, I remembered everything and I lost hope to ever be found or saved. It hurt so much and you weren't there. A-and even now, I still can feel it. I can feel the poison going into my veins, feel my lungs being out of air. It keeps on being painful and there is nothing I can do to prevent it."

Tears flowed down Aramis' cheeks like a torrent. Never before had he spoken so freely about how he had felt about the torture he had suffered.

"Hush, it's alright. I am here. You're not there anymore and there are no more poisons in your veins, I promise. Focus on me and nothing else."

In the fourth month and while they were watching a film, Aramis had asked him if he had taken care of Rochefort personally. Athos replied that yes, he had taken care of it and that Aramis no longer needed to be afraid of him. For you see, after receiving Dr. Hawkins' consent, Athos was allowed to see Rochefort. For weeks now, the Musketeer knew what he was going to do to the Red Guard, and no he wasn't going to kill him. It would be too simple, the coward didn't deserve an easy death. And sending him to prison was a risk that Athos would not take. So he had decided to give the man a slow and painful death. From what the world knew, Rochefort had fled the day before his trial. But for Athos, Porthos, D'Artagnan, Constance, and, now, Aramis, Rochefort was buried alive in a coffin under the newly built shopping center. If Treville did not know, it was because the old man would have been obliged to inform his superiors. This sentence was probably barbaric, but it had the merit of calming the fears of the Musketeer. 

One day during the fifth month, Constance, D'Artagnan, Porthos, and Treville came to the apartment, not unusual but the difference was that the four had guilty faces. They had come to apologize for making a false burial of the death of Aramis and Athos but they had needed to get the kidnappers out of their hinges. They had had doubts about Rocheford's innocence and their plan worked perfectly since they had found them. From there, Aramis laughs, making fun of the faces of their friends. He told them that forgiving them was useless because they had saved them. Thus, the problem was quickly forgotten.

Seven months after being rescued from Rochefort's clutches, everything is almost back to normal. D'Artagnan and Porthos were reassured when they entered into Athos' apartment to hear the two men bickering. If they were bickering they were on the right path to full recovery. That evening, the two men settled the sexual tension that had been between them for quite some time. Except that after this night, things improved, for Athos, it was no longer just a relation based on sex and he showed it explicitly when they were in bed. Thus, their relationship moved to a whole new level. 

A few weeks later, Dr. Hawkins gave Aramis permission to return to duty, as Athos had already received the psychologist's approval three months earlier. The musketeer saw the discomfort on his boyfriend's face when he told him the news after he came back from the shrink. Clearly, Aramis was not yet ready to return to work. So the older and wiser man offered to pack their bags and just leave for a while. Aramis agreed. They began their love trip with Europe: England, Scotland, Germany, Italy, Spain, Greece. Then they went to Japan and then to the Philippines where Athos made his marriage proposal. They ended up in Brazil, Peru, and Bolivia before returning to Paris. 

It was more than a year and a half after being abducted that Aramis and Athos wedding happened, all their friends were invited to the event, as well as Dr. Hawkins. The ceremony was simple as Athos wanted but was still chic. They didn't need to go on a honeymoon after that and they went back to work as Musketeers. They were happy now despite all the lows they had experienced during that year -and they were plenty of them- and that was why they cherished, even more, the incredible times they had experienced.

**Author's Note:**

> BTW, for the second part of the fic, I need to precise that I am no doctor or anything like that so there might be things that I had written that might be inaccurate or not true.


End file.
